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The Chaos by Gerard Nolst Trenité

http://www.inspirefirst.com/2013/10/14/untitled-oil-canvas-2013-kwangho-shin/

Кто сможет без ошибок прочесть с первого раза эту поэму, тот не просто знаток английского языка, тот профессор филологии какого-нибудь именитого ВУЗа в Англии, Австралии или Америке, Канаде.

The Chaos by Gerard Nolst Trenité

Dearest creature in creation
Studying English pronunciation,

I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpsecorpshorse and worse.

I will keep you, Susybusy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.

Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.

Just compare heartbeard, and heard,
Dies and dietlord and word,

Sword and swardretain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)

Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.

But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;

Clovenovenhow and low,
Scriptreceiptshowpoem, and toe.

Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughterlaughter, and Terpsichore,

Typhoidmeaslestopsailsaisles,
Exilessimiles, and reviles;

Scholarvicar, and cigar,
Solarmicawar and far;

OneanemoneBalmoral,
Kitchenlichenlaundrylaurel;

GertrudeGermanwind and mind,
SceneMelpomenemankind.

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
OK, walletmalletchalet.

Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.

Viscousviscountload and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.

And your pronunciation’s OK
When you correctly say croquet,

Roundedwoundedgrieve and sieve,
Friend and fiendalive and live.

Ivyprivyfamousclamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.

Riverrivaltombbombcomb,
Doll and roll and some and home.

Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.

Souls but foulhaunt but aunt,
Fontfrontwontwantgrand, and grant,

Shoesgoesdoes. Now first say finger,
And then say singergingerlinger,

Realzealmauvegauzegouge and gauge,
Marriagefoliagemirage, and age.

Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.

Dostlostpost and dothclothloth.
Jobnobbosomtransomoath.

Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.

Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Feoffer does, and zephyrheifer.

Mintpintsenate and sedate;
Dullbull, and George ate late.

ScenicArabicPacific,
Scienceconsciencescientific.

Libertylibraryheave and heaven,
Rachelachemoustacheeleven.

We say hallowed, but allowed,
Peopleleopardtowed, but vowed.

Mark the differences, moreover,
Between movercoverclover;

Leechesbreecheswiseprecise,
Chalice, but police and lice;

Camelconstableunstable,
Principledisciplelabel.

Petalpanel, and canal,
Waitsurpriseplaitpromisepal.

Worm and stormchaisechaoschair,
Senatorspectatormayor.

Tour, but our and succourfour.
Gasalas, and Arkansas.

SeaideaKoreaarea,
PsalmMaria, but malaria.

Youthsouthsoutherncleanse and clean.
Doctrineturpentinemarine.

Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.

Sally with allyyeaye,
EyeIayayewhey, and key.

Say aver, but everfever,
Neitherleisureskeindeceiver.

Herongranarycanary.
Crevice and device and aerie.

Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegmphlegmaticassglassbass.

Large, but targetgingiveverging,
Oughtoutjoust and scourscourging.

Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.

Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphenroughennephew Stephen,

MonkeydonkeyTurk and jerk,
Askgraspwasp, and cork and work.

Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?

Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?

It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stonesstowedsolacegunwale,

Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewifeverdict and indict.

Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Thoughthroughplough, or dough, or cough?

Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!”

Хотите знать, как прочесть эту английскую поэму? Прослушайте на сайте chaoschallenge.org